What Kanye West Probably Thinks About Ordinary Things
Kanye West is one of the most beloved douche bags of our generation. His strong Twitter game really pays a testament to how big of an asshole this man can be. The Internet explodes over Yeezy almost everyday as it tries to make sense of the meaningless rants he goes on. Not much has changed since the 2009 VMAs... he does not give a shit who he offends with his self-expression.
There are certain things that the public needs to be informed of. This includes whether or not the government can hack our iPhones, the symptoms of a new infectious disease that is spreading globally, and, of course, Kanye West's opinions.
These are some thoughts ‘Ye has probably has on ordinary things:
Tap Water
“What the fuck? You think I would drink tap water? Maybe rap water, but not this shit. I have my H2O imported straight from the Himalayas. As if I would drink the same liquids as commoners. My water has to be better than all the water out there.”
Sunscreen
“You think I need SPF 30? Nah.. the sun needs to wear lotion to protect itself from my shine.”
Lay’s New York Rueben Chips
“It is like a whole sandwich in one chip. So much zest and flavor! The Thousand Island dressing really pairs well with the corn beef. It is innovative and so cutting edge...damn, you think people would believe me if I said that is was my idea and Lay’s stole it? Probably. I'm suing Lay's.”
Sketchers
“My Yeezy shoes were inspired by my first pair of Sketchers. Don't tell anyone.”
Hugs
“I have a scientist who is trying to figure out a way to clone me, just so I can hug myself whenever I want to. That's the one thing missing from my life. Sorry Kim, but Kanye's number one is Kanye.”
Minivans
“Brah, I don’t care if you have 9 kids, a clown car is more stylish than that thing. It looks like a turd on wheels. When I become President in 2020, I am banning the use of minivans.”
Is Kanye a creative genius or simply insane? We are very unsure. But hey, thanks for always sharing your opinions, Kanye. You know how to entertain us and we are #blessed to have you in our lives.