What Does Your SU Gym Say About You?

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Design by Jena Salvatore As the Syracuse temperature begins to drop faster than a freshman at DJ’s, the outdoor joggers and cyclists are moving from sidewalks and bike paths to treadmills and Flywheel. Since we’re #blessed with a handful of gymnasiums, we’ve got options. How does one decide which lovely one to sweat all over, you may ask? Well, you don’t choose the gym, the gym chooses you. Here’s how the gym you go to (or frequently think about going to…) says about you.

Archbold/Flanagan or Brockway

You’re a freshman, and you probably live on the Mount. You’re starting to realize climbing up those steps every day isn’t enough to keep the Freshman 15 from creeping up on you and Ernie is too intimidating, so you head to Archbold, but not before making sure your Tetanus shots are up to date.

If you’re not a freshman but still prefer Archbold, you’re a workout fanatic and want to avoid encountering anybody you know when you’re working out. You’re dedicated your workout routine and forcing small talk with that class friend you did a group project with is not included in that routine. You may have debated putting how much you bench or how fast you run a mile on your resume. Or you feel insecure about working out because you don’t know how to/look ugly when you do.

Women’s Building

Laziness is a foreign concept to you. Just sitting around makes you feel anxious, so you write in your group chat, “Like this if ur down 4 bball,” looking for a friendly pick-up game of basketball. In a world full of Cheerios, you’re a Fruit Loop. Average ways of workout like going for a jog and lifting weights just doesn’t do it for you anymore, because it’s too basic and boring. Instead, your daily workout routine, consists of going for a swim each morning before your first class.

Marshall Square Mall

Your workout consists of a certain amount of time on the treadmill or elliptical, 8-minute-abs, and a sad excuse of a few stretches. Marshall Square Mall Fitness Center is the most convenient for you, which is the only way to get you to work out since you seldom go out of your way for anything. You value physical fitness and a healthy lifestyle, minus the hygiene part. You go to the gym in between classes without showering after, because why would you? Getting a team room in Whitman is never any trouble because nobody can stand being in the same room as you for any longer than they can hold their breath.

Ernie

In addition to your SUID to enter Ernie Fitness Center, wearing a t-shirt with your Greek affiliation or one article of LuLu Lemon apparel is also required. It’s not considered working out unless you’re seen by at least twelve people, and two of them have to be someone you’ve recently hooked up with. You’re a competitive person and always try to beat the person on the treadmill next to you, whether or not they’re aware that working out is a competition is not relevant. You’d rather not go to the gym at all than go by yourself, because if nobody Snapchats you at the gym, did you really go?

Fortunately at Syracuse, you’ve got plenty of options to make sure you’re #fitfam and #gains and shit. Just know that if you’re reading this while you do stretches in front of the TV to reach another M&M, we’re on your side.