Style Guide: What to Wear on Spring Break This Year

It’s Monday.

You’re fighting valiantly to avoid nodding off during your math lecture. Your professor’s indiscernible accent is worse than ever, and you’re pretty sure you’ve forgotten to turn in your online homework. Again.

But fear not, fellow burned-out student! We’re only two weeks away from spring break, aka nine glorious days sans homework and stress-induced mental breakdowns. It’s time to relax, unwind, and forget everything we’ve learned this semester thus far. (Sorry, professors. It happens every year.)

As you prepare to embark on your well-deserved vacation, make sure your wardrobe is just as ready as you are. If you’re unsure of what to wear, here’s a handy (and somewhat satirical) guide to dressing for some of the most popular spring break destinations in the game. From the comfy confines of your couch at home to the sandy shores of Cancun, Jerk’s got you covered — literally.

Vail, Colorado

In the chilly mountains of Vail, you’re going to want to be bundled up and bougie. Vail is the land of cashmere cowl-necks and designer bags; it’s practically the Paris of Colorado and you must dress accordingly. Of course, you should probably pack some ski gear if you plan on hitting the slopes– gloves and a scarf wouldn’t hurt. It’s going to be chilly (in the 40s, according to Accuweather predictions) but it’s nothing us ‘Cuse kids aren’t used to. Pack your snow pants and ski jackets, but also some classy pieces for aprés ski and late night aperitifs. Who knows, you might just find a swanky cutie sipping spiked hot chocolate by the fire.

Miami, Florida

Is it just me, or does everyone in Miami wear white? If you’re headed to the Sunshine State this break, fill your suitcase with bright colors and plenty of tanning oil. Rompers, maxi dresses, and breezy harem pants are a must. Miami’s not just a beach destination, but a popular nightclub haven too, so your wardrobe needs to work around the clock. Relax on the sand in a jewel-toned bikini and caftan by day, whip out your sexy white cutout dress to hit the bars at night. And definitely, definitely play “I’m in Miami Bitch” while you pregame. Bonus: Ultra Music Festival is conveniently being held here during our break this year, so don't forget your neon crop tops and flower headbands if you plan to ~rave~.

Cancun, Mexico

For the classic college spring break, a bikini and cover-up are really all you need. You’ll have to wear some form of clothing to get into restaurants and bars— no shoes, no shirt, no dice — but if you’re planning on pulling a Spring Breakers type trip, you’re not going to need much. A sarong might be a good investment for those nights out dancing on the beach and a maxi dress is perfect for drunk brunch the next morning. Lay out by the pool in that Triangl bathing suit, sip a piña colada, and try to ignore your pounding hangover. The killer tan and incredible party stories will definitely make the headaches worth it.

Europe

Ooh la la, how cultured! If you’re vacationing in Europe, prepare for some seriously incredible food and scenery. Europeans are also known for their impeccable sense of style, so if you’re making the voyage across the pond, pack your Sunday best — or, you know, make a “necessary” pit stop at Topshop once you arrive. Speaking as a former abroad student (love you forever, London), consider bringing along a wide-brimmed hat, some ripped jeans, and a badass pair of Chelsea boots to wear as you explore the cobblestoned streets. Finally, top it all off with a Zara turtleneck and you’re basically Alexa Chung #yaskween.

A Cruise

This is a great opportunity to break out the stereotypical tourist attire. In a boat full of overdressed, elderly people, be that dude running around in a Hawaiian shirt and bucket hat. Wear your camera around your neck and document everything you see. Put zinc on your nose and leave it there. GO NUTS. This is your time to shine.

Note: You could just wear shorts and a t-shirt or a printed dress like everyone else. But it wouldn’t be half the fun.

Your Couch

Low-key, this is the best vacation option out there. Pull out your chicest sweatpants, your classiest sweatshirt, and a nice glass of Pinot Noir. Netflix is calling and your body is ready— all you need is a warm blanket and all ten episodes of Making a Murderer. You don’t need bikinis and margaritas to make this break great (ok, maybe just the margaritas). As long as you’ve got cozy clothes, homemade food, and a great big comfy couch, you’ll get all the relaxation you need.

Syracuse, New York

If you’re stuck in ‘Cuse for spring break, I’m sure you don’t need my advice for how to dress. It’s probably going to snow a good three or four feet and drop into the negatives, as per usual, so you might as well plan to spend your days snuggled into your Canada Goose and LuLu leggings. On the bright side, campus will be pretty quiet and you probably won’t run into that many human beings (the savage squirrels of the quad are another story). Keep on keepin’ on in that parka, and enjoy nine blissful days of solitude.

Wherever your spring break might be, take advantage of your time off and decompress. All clothing jokes and puns aside, this is a great opportunity to relieve any stress that’s been building up this semester— if you look fabulous while doing it, that’s an added bonus.