How to Enjoy Fake Spring
It’s that time of year again, folks. Welcome to Fake Spring! There’s a warm breeze, Seasonal Affective Disorder is taking a week off, and you’ve stopped judging people for wearing shorts to class. In order to make the most out of this beautiful (environmentally detrimental) time of year, here’s our guide to Fake Spring.
- Get some goddamn sun.
This shouldn’t have to be on the list, but it can be hard to remember that there’s a world beyond your dorm room. Pull out the Frisbee that’s been hiding under your bed, air out your sex blanket, and head to the quad! You’ll enjoy feeling like you’re one of the people on the Syracuse admissions brochure. It’s, like, wholesome.
- Dress appropriately, but don’t go wild.
Yes, it’s freeing to finally feel like the wind isn’t bitch-slapping you every time you step outside. However, keep in mind that it’s still technically February. Have a bit of reverence for our slowly dying planet by wearing jeans instead of shorts, or your Patagonia as a jacket, not an extra layer. If you dress like it’s the middle of July, you’re practically begging for the negative temperatures to come back.
- Reconsider your winter relationship.
We’ve made it through most of cuffing season! Fake Spring is your ticket out of the relationship you threw yourself into as soon as the weather dropped below 40. The very real fear of being alone for the darkest time of year is gone, at least for the next week or two. Now is the time to formulate an escape plan. No one wants to be tied down when warm weather frat darties start back up.
- Don’t get complacent.
This is Syracuse. We all know this isn’t going to last much longer. We might get the weather’s version of a Spring Break, but be aware that you’re going to have to break out your fracket again this year. This is temporary, which is depressing, but it’s at least happening.