Why Syracuse Men Are Walking Red Flags

Graphic by Marisa Goldberg

By now, we’ve all seen the Tik Tok trend where users point out their biggest red flags or dating “icks” as they peruse the dating scene. 

Well don’t worry ‘cuse men, we’re here to do it for you. Take notes. 

A ‘Cuse Guide to Red Flags: 

Buddy Boeheim Obsession: Ft. the awkward selfies at the tailgate. We wish someone would look at us the way Syracuse men look at Buddy Boeheim. 

Lives At Harry’s: If you’re ever wondering where your manz may be on a Tuesday-Sunday night, don’t panic. Our bet is you can find him at Harry’s trying to get the high score on the punching bag. 

Doesn’t Know How to Cook: No one wants to be their boyfriend’s mom. Like, no one. It’s one thing to be called “mommy” in bed… It’s another to have to roleplay at all hours of the day. 

Leos/Libras/Pisces: One word: toxic. 

Borderline Fraternity Incest: If he refers to other members in his fraternity as his “brothers,” “bros,” or “brethren” in every other sentence, Good Luck Charlie. 

Zero Filter: They will hit you with the most out-of-pocket comments when you’re least expecting it, leaving you speechless and in shock. Sorry we didn’t expect to talk about our sex life at the football game Kyle… 

Drinks Whole Milk: Literally never trust ANYONE who enjoys drinking a full glass of milk without activating their f*cking gag reflex. 

Pit Vipers: No explanation needed. 

Whitman Douchebag: Fridays are just the perfect days to discover who you should be avoiding in a sweaty frat basement - they make it so easy!! If you see a guy dressed in “business casual” as you’re grabbing your morning Starbies, memorize that face & book it.

Snapback Hat = 24/7 Closet Staple: We swear they even shower with them on. It’s almost like they’re hiding something under there… Possibly the ability to commit? 

Reposts @barstoolcuse Like It’s A Bible Verse: We wouldn’t be surprised if Barstool is the only media platform these guys are getting their news from. You may never be reposted on their stories, but @barstoolcuse definitely will be. 

Navy Bedding: Like, why is it so damn common? Is it because they have no sense of individual style or personality? Or is it because it is easy to hide stains from hookups with other chicks? The world may never know... 

Social Media Presence Consisting of Guns & Camo: ‘Nuf said. 

Unironic Hanging of “Saturdays Are For The Boys” Flags: This is the cardinal rule. If you see a SAFTB flag, call an uber. A Barstool flag is just as bad… and arguably an American Flag but we’ll save that for another article. 

Hardcore Playboi Carti Obsession: Whether they’re playing Whole Lotta Red on repeat at the pregame or using Choppa Won’t Miss lyrics as Instagram captions, you should be concerned when their favorite artist is Playboi Carti. 

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